That Vladimir Putin guy is such a rascal! Fortunately, we have the New York Times and other media outlets to help us unravel his elaborate schemes against Hillary Clinton. You might think that you finally have a handle on the Russia collusion hoax against Donald Trump, after the Director of National Intelligence, Tulsi Gabbard, declassified a bunch of new files last week. But according to the New York Times, we’re all wrong. It turns out that the Russia hoax had “all the hallmarks of a Russian disinformation campaign!”
The media had to say something when Director Gabbard released all those formerly classified files. The Times has now given the marching orders to the rest of the press.
The Times reports that the Russia collusion files don’t say what we all think they said. What the files prove is that “Russian spies” planted fake Russia collusion emails where Hillary Clinton would find them. The Russians tricked the gullible and naïve former Secretary of State by planting fake Russia collusion documents about another Russia collusion hoax inside of a Russian hoax because…
Oh, I give up. It’s like the plot of a Christopher Nolan movie, only dumber.
We can finally say, definitively, that the Russia collusion hoax boiled down to three facts.
First, Hillary Clinton was up the creek without a paddle in late 2015 and early 2016. She had been caught red-handed by the Benghazi Committee. Hillary had kept an illegal server in her bathroom closet at home for the entire four years when she served as Obama’s Secretary of State. She illegally kept mountains of classified documents on that server, which was hacked by Russia, China, Iran, Ukraine, Israel, and a teenager in Romania (true story).
To distract from that fact, George Soros’s underlings and Clinton campaign officials decided to make up fake connections tying Donald Trump to Russia. Hillary knew about it and authorized the plan.
Second, the CIA and the FBI found out that Hillary planned to have her team make up a bunch of Russia collusion BS about Trump.
Third, instead of alerting the public that Hillary was concocting a fake intelligence report to smear Donald Trump in a dirty campaign trick, Barack Obama ordered the intelligence agencies to jump in to help. The CIA, FBI, ODNI, and NSA all came to Hillary’s rescue. They used assistance from intelligence agencies in Great Britain, Italy, Ukraine, and Australia to help Hillary invent the Russia collusion hoax.
Those are the facts.
What the Russians actually knew was that Hillary Clinton was taking heavy tranquilizers to regulate her violent emotional and mental problems in public. They knew this, along with about 30,000 additional pieces of classified, vital national security secrets, because they hacked Hillary’s illegal bathroom server.
Hillary was in serious legal trouble in early 2016. The Clinton Foundation’s shady donation schemes were under an FBI investigation. Bill Clinton was getting tons of bad press after we learned that he had taken 26 flights on Jeffrey Epstein’s plane to The Island Where Nothing Ever Happened.
Crooked Hillary tied Bernie Sanders in Iowa, after 84% of young Democrat women under 30 voted against her in the primary. She lost New Hampshire in a landslide. And then here came the news of her illegal bathroom server!
The primaries were no big deal. The DNC simply rigged the rest of the race to steal the nomination from Bernie. That nagging server, and the mishandling of classified documents, was a bigger problem. Three weeks after Congress subpoenaed the server, Hillary’s lawyer wiped it clean with BleachBit.
After the DNC’s emails were leaked to WikiLeaks (probably by the late Seth Rich), Hillary needed some way to smear Donald Trump. The Russia collusion hoax was the solution.
Fortunately for Hillary, “her people” were running the intel agencies, and Obama didn’t want to tarnish his legacy even further by having his former Secretary of State end up in prison. The FBI “tabled” the investigation of the Clinton Foundation, never to return to it again. Former FBI Director James Comey also proclaimed Hillary to be innocent of any crimes related to her illegal bathroom server.
That was a lot of negative press to overcome, but George Soros came through for Hillary. The Russia hoax was that solution. They were all in on it. The only people who weren’t in on the plan were Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump.
We may not know all the granular details of the Russia hoax yet. More documents are coming soon. But we can say with certainty that the Russians did not perpetrate a Russian hoax by planting another fake Russia collusion hoax where the innocent Hillary Clinton fell for their wily tricks.